Not in Fauquier County

Via The Atlantic. Based upon decades spent studying American culture and the Internet, we conclude that there is a 60% chance that this is serious.

When Worlds Collide

Fish; Barrel.

Who's the Highest Paid State Employee in YOUR State?

In not one of these 50 United States is that the Governor, or even the head of the State Police. In fact, it's almost always the head football coach at the state university; except where it's the basketball coach or, in New Hampshire, the ice hockey coach.

From Deadspin.

We're reminded that in 1929 or 1930, when asked how he felt about making more money than the President of the United States, Babe Ruth responded, "What the hell has Hoover got to do with it? Besides, I had a better year than he did."

Ben Ghazi Pitches for the Astros, right?

Word Association

Just say the first thing that comes into your mind.

San Francisco: hippies . . . Alcatraz . . . Golden Gate Bridge . . . typhoid fever. Wait, what?

In which we consider the aphrodisiacal properties of frozen eggs

"Eight months ago, I met a wonderful 45-year-old single dad who wants more kids and wanted to hear all about my frozen eggs. Four hours after meeting at a New York wine bar, we were kissing in Central Park in a warm September foggy mist. I don't know if it is me or the eggs, but I am more relaxed in this relationship than I have ever been in my life."

Evil Billionaires

Bloomberg.com's list of billionaires omits . . . Michael Bloomberg.

The Most Boring Two Minutes in Sports

Today's the day that inbred horses owned by billionaires, ridden by bulimic dwarfs, race around an artificial oval somewhere in Kentucky. There is no other event in all of sports with a higher hype-to -significance ratio. The Kentucky Derby even beats out the first round of the NBA Playoffs in this respect, and that's saying something.  [Come to think of it, we'd pay to see Royce White running around a track carrying a horse on his back.]

Here in Fauquier County, it's the 88th Virginia Gold Cup, in which real horses are ridden by real people over a more-or-less real course.

NOW they tell me . . . .

"Antibiotic Protects Men from Being Too Trusting of Attractive Women"

"Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck."

"You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming."

More relationship advice from kids HERE.

"Very good prospect, also very good hitter."