The Man

There are very few instances in which it is more clear who is The Man, and who is not, than in the course of a Little League baseball game.

Your humble and obedient servant was a Little League baseball coach at the Center of the Empire -- in Washington, D.C. -- for a significant number of years. He had the honor of coaching girls and boys, ages 5 through 18, at various times and places.

From McSweeney's "Lists," a series of things that that author has been called in the course of his duties as a LL umpire:

Blue
Ump
Mister Umpire
Sir
Ref
Mister Umpire, Sir
Blind
Asshole

It was the conceit of the cognoscenti in Washington, D.C., that the umpire was "Mr. Blue." It was the burden of the Gentleman Farmer to be a fan of the cinematic work of Quentin Tarentino, Harvey Keitel, and Steve Buscemi.