Catholic Rioters Kill Dozens, Injure Hundreds
In London, a large unruly crowd gathered in front of Lambeth Palace before marching up Lambeth Road and across the Westminster Bridge to Parliament. Once there, the group became increasingly violent, repeatedly chanting "Ave Maria." Scotland Yard could not immediately determine the meaning of the phrase, but said it appears to be Latin. The mob finally dispersed after burning effigies of Oliver Cromwell and someone they identified as "Rowan Williams."
Rioting also broke out in the scattered enclaves of extremist Roman Catholics in the United States. In Arlington, Virginia, a large group of young women set out to stage a sit-in at a Protestant Church. Despite attempting to gain entry to Methodist, Presbyterian, Anglican, and Baptist church buildings, they were thwarted when they discovered that all were closed, locked, and empty, this being a weekday. "We were expecting violence from these girls," said Captain Frank Lovejoy of the Arlington County police, "They were all wearing those lacy head-scarves, which is a sure sign that you're dealing with an extreme splinter-group."
An editorial in the mainstream "National Catholic Reporter" condemned the protests, which it attributed to a "small group of superstitious, reactionary Papists" in no way reflecting the views of "a majority of American Catholics." The editorial went on to suggest that this Sunday be declared a "special day of tolerance" and urged all Catholics to express their solidarity by eating a bowl of ice cream.