"The fox knows many things, but the hedgehog knows one big thing."

                --Archilochus

Glenn Reynolds:
"Heh."

Barack Obama:
"Impossible to transcend."

Albert A. Gore, Jr.:
"An incontinent brute."

Rev. Jeremiah Wright:
"God damn the Gentleman Farmer."

Friends of GF's Sons:
"Is that really your dad?"

Kickball Girl:
"Keeping 'em alive until 7:45."

Hired Hand:
"I think . . . we forgot the pheasant."




I'm an
Alcoholic Yeti
in the
TTLB Ecosystem



Monday, May 12, 2008

G&S Sins Frequently

As you may have heard (on these pages? probably not), the Vatican released their revised, hip, with-it, au courant list of deadly sins. A refresher on the originals from the Catechism:
Pride
Envy
Gluttony
Lust
Anger
Greed
Sloth
Basic. We know them. Hell, even Brad Pitt knows them.

The updated list (per the BBC):
Environmental pollution
Genetic manipulation
Accumulating excessive wealth
Inflicting poverty
Drug trafficking and consumption
Morally debatable experiments
Violation of fundamental rights of human nature
Uhhh... what? You lost us on "morally debatable experiments," Ratzy. In the tradition of "stuff that really gets our goat," G&S (with some help from its cynical, godless, hedonistic research staff) offers some additional suggestions. After all, why stop at 7?
Littering
Line-cutting
Calling skim milk "non-fat"
Stopping when you get to the top of an escalator
Bouncing a check on purpose
One-sided printing
Exiting out the front door of the bus when there are people waiting to get on
Unsecured wi-fi
Using Starbucks corporate lingo when you order their drinks
Rooting for the Yankees
Failing to observe daylight saving time for no good contemporary reason
Wearing one of those bluetooth earpiece thingies all the time
Bottling domestic beer without a twist-off cap
Doing the macarena two beats off so that you switch in the middle of the measure
Doing the macarena at all
Amtrak
Keeping your .edu email address
Analog clocks on car dashboards
Gentrification
"Now That's What I Call Music!"
Saying "begs the question" when you mean "raises the question"
Giving raisins to trick-or-treaters
Red Bull
Calling everybody 'bro'
"Irregardless"
Insisting dollar coins are going to happen this time around
American Idol
Engagement party registries
Viral videos
Lower back tattoos
Citing Wikipedia
Your tireless editors continue to take suggestions.

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Comments on "G&S Sins Frequently"

 

Anonymous uncle m said ... (6:15 PM) : 

I'd like to offer a few additions and a correction:

1. "I could care less;"

2. Not having your cash or credit card in hand, or check filled out completely (but for the amount,) when you hit the front of the checkout line;

3. Designer martinis; and

4. Putting fruit in a bottle of beer.

As for the correction:

Lower back tattoos ... ON MEN, because we all know that lower back tattoos on women are, well, awesome.

 

Anonymous uncle m said ... (6:17 PM) : 

Oh ya ... and Krispy Kreme donuts.

 

Blogger Hired Hand said ... (6:23 PM) : 

We should have posted "East Coast bias," now that I think of it.

 

Blogger Gentleman Farmer said ... (10:52 AM) : 

Glad to see you guys having so much fun without me. Carry on. I'm, like, really busy, man.

But I must agree that Krispy Kremes should be high on the list.

 

Anonymous selfish country music loving lady said ... (3:33 PM) : 

East Coast bias is fantastic and you know it.

 

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