"The fox knows many things, but the hedgehog knows one big thing."


Glenn Reynolds:

Barack Obama:
"Impossible to transcend."

Albert A. Gore, Jr.:
"An incontinent brute."

Rev. Jeremiah Wright:
"God damn the Gentleman Farmer."

Friends of GF's Sons:
"Is that really your dad?"

Kickball Girl:
"Keeping 'em alive until 7:45."

Hired Hand:
"I think . . . we forgot the pheasant."

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Thursday, December 10, 2009

If the Holy Mass be Disturbed by Gunfire . . . . .

Father Z, strict liturgist extraordinaire, claims to have received the following inquiry: "Suppose during a EF Mass ["Extraordinary Form," i.e., in Latin, for you Presbyterians], a gunman or threatening person enters the church, and opens fire. What can be done within the rubrics . . . ."

The good Father responds:
Lemme get this straight… what rubrics are followed in case of gunfire...?

I believe there is a little known rubric which calls for the deacon and subdeacon (who in any event should be packing) to take out, reverently, their .9mm and return fire. As I read it, they are to recite the Maledictory Psalms while firing. At the change of a clip/magazine, they may bow, or duck.

In the case of, probability actually… of the mention of the Holy Name, it is still necessary to uncover.

If one crosses the sanctuary, however, honorifics are not to be observed.

In the case of an incapacitating wound, it is permitted for the priest celebrant, or one of the sacred ministers, or any priest in choir, to give the assailant, et al., last rites.

Any bishop present ought immediately place himself in the line of fire between the assailant and the priest celebrant and then begin to remonstrate with the attacker, invoking the help of St. Michael. He is to wave his arms and shout: "in manus tuas commendo spiritum meum". [Lk. 23:46, for you Anglicans.]

At the conclusion of the gunfire, it is permitted to sing the Te Deum.... unless it is Good Friday.

Mass (or the service) continues afterward from the point it was interrupted, though it is not necessary to start in the middle of a word; going back to the first word of the sentence is sufficient.

Alternately, if the sacred ministers are not packing, there is no reason why a group of religious could not be formed as a sort of liturgical militia against such an eventuality.

I believe in this case, the gun stock must have a ribbon of the color of the days.


Comments on "If the Holy Mass be Disturbed by Gunfire . . . . ."


Anonymous The Old Timer said ... (1:20 PM) : 

Is this, like maybe, something that gets used fairly regularly in Sicily?


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