Millennials Skip Adulthood, Go Straight to Mid-Life Crisis

A new survey (science!):

Work and relationship pressures make the mid-30s the start of many British people's unhappiest decade, a survey suggests.

Of the 2,000 people quizzed, more aged 35 to 44 said that they felt lonely or depressed than in other age groups.

[snip]

Of those surveyed, 21% of men and women aged 35 to 44 said they felt lonely a lot of the time, and a similar percentage said that bad relationships, either at work or home, had left them feeling depressed.

[ship]

Claire Tyler, Relate's chief executive, said: "Traditionally we associated the mid-life crisis with people in their late 40s to 50s, but the report reveals that this period could be reaching people earlier than we would expect.

Hmmm. This means that late members of Generation X, and older members of the "Echo Boomers," or Generation Y, rightly distinguished for extending adolescence, stretching out school, and postponing marriage and child-bearing until into their 30s (or beyond), very quickly thereafter discover that being a grownup is, like, hard. And, like, dishes get dirty and the car needs to go to the shop and the kid threw up on the cat which threw up on the bed, and that the guy in the next cubicle has a problem with personal hygiene.

So they chill in the dorm or Mom's basement, then work three days a week at Ruby Tuesday, decide at 32 that it's time to get their act together, and shortly thereafter have an existential "mid-life" crisis.

The human race is doomed.