"The fox knows many things, but the hedgehog knows one big thing."


Glenn Reynolds:

Barack Obama:
"Impossible to transcend."

Albert A. Gore, Jr.:
"An incontinent brute."

Rev. Jeremiah Wright:
"God damn the Gentleman Farmer."

Friends of GF's Sons:
"Is that really your dad?"

Kickball Girl:
"Keeping 'em alive until 7:45."

Hired Hand:
"I think . . . we forgot the pheasant."

I'm an
Alcoholic Yeti
in the
TTLB Ecosystem

Friday, June 25, 2010

Vacation Time

Your proprietor is decamping for a more friendly climate than that currently provided by Washington, D.C. in July. Depending on how things go, I'll be back in a week, or you just might never hear from me again.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Clint Webb for Senate


Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Edith Shain Dies at 91

You think you don't know who she is, but you do.

More HERE.


Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Today's "Made For G&S" Quote

"The cowboy, whose real name is Robert Burck, sent a cease-and-desist letter to his foil, Sandy Kane, a fixture of the city comedy scene and former stripper famous for closing her act by lighting her breasts on fire."


Tylenol Rapid Release Cheesesteaks


Friday, June 18, 2010

June 18, 1940


Friday Morning Palate Cleanser


Thursday, June 17, 2010

Dear Leader

In related news:


Stories You May Have Missed

Southwest Airline employee finds box of between 40 and 60 heads on airplane: "It wasn't labeled or packaged properly," said Ashley Rogers, a Southwest spokeswoman.

"The teacher demands that the accused refrains in future from drawing rabbits on the blackboard . . . ." [SFW]

New USB device counterintuitively promises ". . .the tumescence will be eliminated in a short time so as to avoid chafing." [SFW]

Scott Adams (yes, THAT Scott Adams) in the WSJ: "If there's oil on the moon, BP will be the first to send a hose into space and suck on the moon until it's the size of a grapefruit. As an investor, that's the side I want to be on, with BP, not the loser moon."

"Naked Funeral Director Loses License." [SFW]

Calvin Klein's cologne "Obsession for Men" scientifically proven to attract cougars. [SFW]


Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Classless Warfare

I know I sound like a crank when I rail against "our political masters," and speak of them as if they were members of the peerage, and it was 1650.  I think we've become inured to it; we've been conditioned by having to fawn over and flatter petty civil servants into doing their job at the DMV or the hall of records; we're now used to the threatening moral lecture from the state trooper.  We've come to assume that "the Government" should do something about fat kids, unmowed lawns, and expensive health insurance.

So we should not be surprised when those with power and the trappings of power come to feel self-important, remote, and entitled.  They are about the business of the abstract People, which busy-ness has no truck with some guy on the street.  "Voters" and "taxpayers" and "citizens" are mere theoretical concepts to our masters.  There is much to be said for the old fashioned ward boss, who knew it was part of his job to walk down the street and talk to regular people, listen to their problems, and make sure the street light and the pothole got fixed, and arrange for a loading zone in front of Angelo's deli.

Our masters now live in a bubble of entitlement in which they speak and we listen; where they dispense favors and we are grateful; where we approach with awe and tug our forelock.  We are to beg permission to approach the new nobility, and woe unto him who commits lèse majesté.

And, as if to make my point for me, the Washington Post's "Reliable Source" has this take: ". . . but who filmed it and why?" That is, was this a person entitled to speak with the Earl of Raleigh & Marquess of Fayetteville? Or instead some cheeky bumpkin?


Science Marches On

Digital Fingerprint Technology?  CHECK
Retinal Scan Software?  CHECK
Facial-Recognition Device?  CHECK
Penis Recognition Software?  CHECK

Wait, what?  "Chatroulette has long featured the rawest side of humanity -- copulating couples, men taking their pants off, and so on. But it also allows for a potentially rewarding (and potentially lucrative) random human connection, and that's what interests investors."


Monday, June 14, 2010

The Buck Stops Here


Flag Day

Saturday, June 12, 2010

You've GOT to Love the Israelis

Last Saturday the Jerusalem Post reported on a very unfortunate error committed by the Israeli Government Press Office:
The Government Press Office’s distribution of an e-mail containing a link to a satirical video on the Free Gaza flotilla affair was “an honest mistake” and has been corrected, the head of the GPO Daniel Seaman said on Sunday.

Seaman said the link to the video “We Con the World” was accidentally sent out to members of the foreign press on Friday along with hundreds of e-mails that are sent out on a daily basis, and does not represent any official stance of the GPO. After the e-mail was sent, the GPO sent out a statement explaining that the video “was not intended for general release” and that its contents “in no way represent the official policy of either the Government Press Office or of the State of Israel.”
Oh my. What an unfortunate error. How much more embarrassing that the darned video went viral, and quickly garnered over a million hits on YouTube. While it would be interesting to know how many hits it's received over the last week, alas, we'll never know. Because YouTube took it down, citing ". . . a copyright claim by Warner/Chappell Music, Inc." Users keep posting copies on YouTube, but the links get taken down, go back up, are taken down, and so on.

But the collection of tubes that is the interwebs is rather more robust than our wannabe masters might wish it were:


Hey! Isn't that . . . . ?

Yes. In fact it is.


Enough With the Cute Kittehs


Friday, June 11, 2010


Real clowns protest crimes committed by phony clowns.


Band from TV: Goodnight Irene


Thursday, June 10, 2010

Cyberdyne Systems Announces New Breakthrough, Still Looking For Sarah Connor

What could possibly go wrong:
Using infrared beams the drones are able to find each others' location and connect with one another using magnets, completely autonomously.

* * *

The group is able to keep itself level by using altitude sensors in each robot which speak to each other using infrared to make sure the flight is even.

Even if one of the robots in the swarm fails, the others are able to reposition themselves to keep the aircraft flying.

* * *

The robots exchange information and combine this with their own sensor measurements to determine how much thrust is needed for take-off.

When the flight is over, the robots are able to simply detach their magnetic docking system and separate and drop to the ground where they can drive away.

Even if the robots were attacked they are able to detach from each other and then find one another and reform on the ground.

If the array’s level flight is disturbed, each vehicle individually determines the amount of thrust required to correct for the disturbance based on its own position.

While it is only a research project at the moment the 'Distributed Flight Array' can, in theory, be scaled up to contain any number of individual robots.


Black Holes

Hallmark pulls a graduation card:

If you're thinking you've heard this before, you're right:

Hmmm. White out; white lightning; white lead; white plague; white snakeroot; white knuckle. Not to mention white chocolate, which is disgusting.

Our main problem, however, is that we loath cream.


Wednesday, June 09, 2010

Four Turns - 21 Seconds


Saturday, June 05, 2010

When Cats Attack


Friday, June 04, 2010

"Is this cool, or what?!" The Court is Not Amused

Clear v. Superior Court:
[P]etitioner created a page on the MySpace Web site purportedly in the name of a pastor of a church. Petitioner and his family had left the church about a year before the pastor discovered the Web page. The Web page purports to be written by the pastor and contains statements that he has engaged in homosexual activity and narcotics use. The pastor reported to a detective from the San Bernardino County Sheriff‟s Department that these statements are false. The pastor expressed concern because he is the pastor of a church ruled by a board of trustees and a higher church echelon and such allegations could influence board members to fire him and church members to leave. He said that church members had questioned him about the Web page and some had left, although he had not been fired.
The decision is on the equivalent of a motion to dismiss, which means the case can now go to trial as to whether these actions constitute criminal "false personation":
Section 529 prohibits anyone to falsely personate another in either his private or official capacity and in such assumed character either: “3. Does any other act whereby, if done by the person falsely personated, he might, in any event, become liable to any suit or prosecution, or to pay any sum of money, or to incur any charge, forfeiture, or penalty, or whereby any benefit might accrue to the party personating, or to any other person.” (§ 529, subd. 3.)
California apparently no longer retains criminal defamation or libel, although it seems clear that a civil action would lie in this instance.

The more interesting situation is that in which an identity is taken on and used to express things that are objectively true -- but derogatory -- or which constitute opinions. Surely one is allowed to say, "My ex-boyfriend is a cheating [true], lying [true], scumbucket [opinion], who seldom bathes [opinion? true?]." So should one be similarly allowed to claim to be the ex, and announce "I slept around the entire time I was with Mary Ann"? Should we care if the claims are implausible, and the impersonation clumsy and unbelievable? Or should we instead concern ourselves with proof of objective harm? How about subjective harm, such as psychological trauma?

We ourselves never assume that, when on the Interwebs, we're looking at what we seem to be looking at, or that we're talking with whom it's claimed we're talking. If we did otherwise, we'd be dating 300-pound teenage boys sitting at a keyboard in Singapore.

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Guns Kill (People Without Guns)

As gun sales rise, violent crimes (including murder) decline.

More HERE.


Hope & Change

By now everyone except those with eyes that will not see know that "Hope & Change" is Chicago Politics as Usual:  taxpayer money to bail out institutionalized wealth (the rich will always be with us), taxpayer money to bail out the auto unions, a health-care takeover intended to make millions of Americans dependent upon our political masters, offers of federal jobs to influence federal elections, and the branding of dissent (once the highest form of patriotism) as sedition.

Real hope and change looks rather different.  It's overweight, blunt, and talks with a Jersey accent:


Thursday, June 03, 2010

Housewives Are Easy


And We're Back!

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